Thursday, 12 March 2015

Happiness

Hello! I haven't posted for so many months, I know.
At least, I admit it. I felt really guilty about it and have went through so
many times where i'm like "Oh, let's make a blog post about that, I'll write it tonight"
and then I totally forget, am just too lazy or I write it half way and never finish it.
Anyways, i'm here now.  Maybe one of the reasons why I
 haven't posted much was because I had no more willpower to do so and
was just too depressed but then again, I may just be making up excuses to
avoid saying that I was in fact too lazy hahah. I'm
not sure if this post will be as long as I usually would write but
 I'll update some important things about my life since the last time
I posted. My last post which was about Social Anxiety (S.A.D)
was in 2014, now its 2015. I spent my new years in Singapore, it was a lot of fun and I
spent good times with my family.


Okay so I think one of the biggest and most important updates 
is that I am happily and proud to say I am finally recovering from the major depression I had. No, I am not saying I'm not depressed anymore, just not as severe as I was a few months ago. I still do sometimes have breakdowns and feel like i'm worthless
 but it is only maybe once in two weeks. This is really good, before, I would have
breakdowns at least once a week and feel worthless every day.
I would feel like no one loves me but now I love myself. I am so happy that
I am finally recovering, I did not like being depressed at all. 

So I think it started when it was in November that I actually 
realized that I am slowly but maturely recovering. I realized I didn't
feel so horrible everyday like I used to and I felt like sometimes I feel happy.
Maybe that doesn't make sense to people who haven't been through depression before
but when you are depressed you hardly ever ever feel happy. It would be rare to genuinely
feel happy for a day. Well anyways what I wanted to say is, I've really
changed, I hate it when people say this but I truly mean it this time, new year new me.
And its a good change, I've ACTUALLY been enjoying school, I love all my new friends, I love my class, I love studying and most of all is that I've been doing really good in my
 studies recently especially in quizzes so far. It's because in the beginning of the year I
decided I would make a lot of effort this year in my studies and also because
 I'm gonna be sitting for PT3 this year. I wanna have good results and to
achieve that I needed to change myself for the greater good, which I have. I'm
truly so proud and happy for myself for actually doing good in school
and basically life. I've also felt a lot better with myself and have nearly
 accepted myself for being me no matter how imperfect I am.

Ah anyways, I totally forgot the whole point of me even writing this post, I wanted to list all the great things in life that make me super happy. I love them all.

1) Green Tea
2) Matcha anything basically
3) Salmon
4) Sushi
5) Good music
6) Skin care products
7) Happy romance animes like
kaichou wa maid sama and special A
8) Happy memories with friends
9) Cute messages to me
10) Coconut ice cream
11) Long road trips
12) Cute nice people esp boys
13) Coconut Shake (I tried one in Alor Setar & it was so good)
14) Baking
15) Drawing & anything to do with art
16) Learning new things
17) Bubble wraps
18) Receiving parcels/gifts
19) Mochi
20) Makeup
21) Videos from my fav youtuber 😇❤️
22) Dim Sum
23) Dark chocolate


This is what i can think of as of right now but I will be continuously adding things to the list as the year goes by.

I have got to pack my things for now because I will be going to Ipoh
 today for my cousins solemnization and then Saturday & Sunday I
will be at Alor Setar for my other cousin's solmenization. I am a very
 busy girl haha. And then Monday & Tuesday I will be attending extra classes
arranged by my school. So, thats it for now, I 'm not gonna say anything about
 posting more or when because I really doubt i'll stick to that promise so
I won't say anything anymore!
Have a good day everyone!:)

-Sabrina

P.S: Remember when I made a playlist dedicated to people struggling, well, i'm now gonna makes a playlist of songs and videos that make me really happy. I will post that soon when I have enough songs on it. 

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